(no subject)

[xp_hawkeye]

I've just finished the first draft of my third scientific paper of the year - this one's on the interaction of mass with black holes, specifically those contained/confined through magical means and how that interaction allows for transference of living tissue (ie people) through space/time into alternate dimensions without them being vaporized - and sent it off to my editor.

If anyone feels like peer reviewing it, let me know. God knows I won't be able to actually send it anywhere or have it published. And just thinking about Jane getting her hands on it gives me hives. She's already got one stabilized Einstein-Rosen bridge to poke at. We don't need to give her an unstabilized one.

Comments

[xp_darcy]

It's not Jane I'd be worried about, so much as her employer. Last thing we want is SWORD deciding to set up camp in the backyard. I just crossed myself reflexively thinking about it, and I'm not even Catholic.

[xp_hawkeye]

I mean, I trust Jane to keep it to herself, since she knows how well we all interact with SHIELD/SWORD these days, but yeah. It'd probably be a little sus if she just started hanging out here all the time. And I don't even want to know what kind of mansion security things would be necessary once Thor figured out she was here and decided to come visit.

[xp_darcy]

Absolutely not, you don't even bring Katie Kate out here.

[xp_hawkeye]

I mean, true, and I don't want Jane's science to science all over my science.

[xp_darcy]

Hon. I don't hate to break this to you, but Jane's science IS your science. At least with this particular subject. Like. She went through "oh that crackpot" hell, she's the OG, I will fight you.

[xp_hawkeye]

Does it count for nothing that mine's unstable?

I mean, at least she could publish her stuff. Everybody knows about Thor. Everybody loves Thor. Hell, I love Thor. Have you adequately appreciated that man's abs? And he can put away beer like it's water, if I didn't respect Jane (and also myself) I would've tried to steal him ages ago.

But no, I get what you mean. People were awful to Jane and Selvig, I'm not actually arguing that point. The shit they had to deal with was super legit. I'm just sad I can't share my theories with the general public... or like, the scientific elite. Y'know? Y'know.

[xp_darcy]

I mean yeah she can publish now but the NDAs and blackouts at first were killer. We had to fight like wildcats to get my internship cleared enough to actually *get* me the credits.

[xp_hawkeye]

Yeah, they're a bitch with their NDAs and shit. Do not like and/or want.

[xp_darcy]

Some of them make sense but like... dude's running around on camera, there's not a Schrödinger's cat in that bag! Am I mixing my science? Yes. Do I care? This glass of Gabe's mix says no.

[xp_hawkeye]

Go with the glass of Gabe's mix on that one.

[xp_darcy]

Have I let you try it? I should, it's very tasty.

[xp_hawkeye]

No, but I definitely agree that you should!

[xp_darcy]

I'll bring you some down next time I'm on monitor duty.

[xp_wildchild]

Oh my god bro bro bro bro BRO

"sent it off to my editor" showed up at my door with a thumb drive of some fuckin' ... words that I had to legit like - okay look I'm guessing your math is fine because angles and physics and move things from place to place is what you DO but like bro

bro we have GOT to talk about like - I'm not sure you can call it a Scientific Paper if you're not publishing it and it's just for the mansion? Like.

First of all, the # of times I had to text you to be like "Explain it like I'm a really under-educated nine year old" was way lower than the actual journal article you wrote last time, so if *I* can understand most of this it's not science it's a Portals for Dummies book. YOU DREW DIAGRAMS.

actually the diagrams are pretty solid, I think one of them would work really good for the "don't put body parts into the portal because you will melt" safety sign.

also I took out two 'that's what she said' jokes in my email with my first pass notes because they were way too low hanging fruit.

[xp_hawkeye]

You're a gentleman and a scholar, sir.

Also, I should pay you. For editing my shit. Like. Is twenty-five cents a word good? I don't know what people are paying for that. I don't wanna be a dick about it. I'll backpay you and shit, too. If nothing else, these can go in the eXcal library... wherever that might be now that Topaz has relocated... everything. Not that I blame her.

Man.

Also. Those diagrams are integral to understanding the dematerialization that's possible and actually even probable if you go through the wormhole the 'normal' way, because let me tell you, black holes are intense and actually it's theorized that going through one unprotected elongates you and time distorts so much that you just... keep... going... forever. So. Yeah. I don't remember why I got onto black holes, but actually it's probably because I don't want the wormhole to turn into one. It gives me anxiety.

[xp_wildchild]

...

so this entire paper fulla words I had to look up and then make sure you were using gramatically correctly is because you had the Anxiety about being eaten by a black hole.

man can we go back to "clint shoot arrow adopt squid drop food on floor and debate the five second rule'

[xp_hawkeye]

No, because I'm nearly 40 and I've been informed by reliable resources that this is how adults deal with things.

My squid children are still adorable, though.

[xp_mayhem]

I'd like to read it after editing, but space... physics? Not my strongest suit.

[xp_hawkeye]

Awesome! That'd be great. A peer. To review my paper!

[xp_mayhem]

Baby-tier peer, but I do like reading papers.